If you missed Part One, check it out here.
This ended up being a bigger endeavour than I thought it would be. How do you write about 40 individual characters from a game that no one really plays, but you have a deep obsession with?
Predecessor is a hero shooter/MOBA that was released on the Xbox store last year. It is remake of Paragon a beloved hero shooter/MOBA that didn’t find enough of an audience and was then cancelled.
This was meant to be a joke post that I banged out in an hour, and it has now taken 3 days, and two parts. What have I done?
Well, let’s get started on the second part and the final countdown to best drinking buddy. This is when the direction shifts, and I think I would more openly enjoy drinking with these guys.
17. Howitzer

Favourite Drink: A good smoky whiskey, or possibly the misery of his employees
Now, I wrote a big piece on how fun it would be to drink with Howitzer. That gnarly look, the cigar, the snarky attitude. Howitzer has real “We have Rocket Raccoon at home” vibes. But I was going to argue that I would rather have a 2-bit trash panda than no trash panda at all.
The problem is I played as him as I was writing this piece, and his name has ‘C.E.O.’ ahead of it. Did I get fooled by his frazzled exterior, into endorsing an actual monster as a drinking buddy? I can’t find an explanation in the Wiki, so for now I am going to wait for Howitzer to be sued for insider trading before I cancel him completely.
16. Countess

Favourite Drink: Spicy Bloody Mary
Countess might be one of the most versatile characters in Predecessor, with her having shown up in any lane. As a drinking buddy, I reckon she would be a good laugh even though she might be a little psychotic. Sure, there is a danger that she would be way too classy to hangout with me but if we did get along, it is guaranteed she would know a good local speakeasy where she could brood while I tuck into something delicious.
15. Aurora

Favourite Drink: Vodka, over rocks
Aurora would definitely be a blast to go drinking with. There’d be sweet ice sculptures, we’d be able to make a headline to the bar due to her slide ability, and she just seems like fun which ever way you cut it. She has an angelic face but that’s her secret weapon, you are more likely to find yourself face down in a pile of your own vomit after challenging her to a shots contest.
14. Revenant

Favourite Drink: Moonshine
Nothing like an old-timey, ghost cowboy to set the mood for a drinking session. As a piece of character design he is a mess, but somehow it just works. His eclectic play style means eclectic drinking venues. I am thinking obscure drinking holes: low lights, little-to-no music, musty smells. All of these are qualities I look for and Revenant could be my sensei in that regard (I’ve been watching a lot of Kobra Kai recently and I see myself as Stingray to Revenant’s Johnny Lawrence). My only concern would be Revenant could be pretty tight lipped, a good drinking buddy with Sevarog perhaps, but sometimes I want someone a little raucous.
13. The Fey

Favourite Drink: Midori Melon Ball
I am so bad at playing as The Fey, but there is no denying that she would make a good drinking buddy. She’d pretty easy with any décor, and I imagine she’d have some great stories, what with being some kind of otherworldly creature. Her music tastes aren’t really going to be to my liking (a lot of Irish folk music and probably a bunch of Bagpipe nonsense) but her ability to fly might also save us money on Taxis at 2AM.
12. Gideon

Favourite Drink: Dildo Breweries Cran-demic Sour Fruited Gose – yes that is a real brewery
Look, there is no polite way to put this, I am not for over swearing here on Xbox Tavern, but it has to be said if there is anyone from the Predecessor cast that fucks then it is Gideon. You might think it is one of the vaguely sex-doll looking characters, or the big buff men, but no, it is Gideon. You can see it in the way he moves, those soulful eyes, his buff but not too buff physique. This is a man who surprises you by putting on Sufjan Stevens and then talking about your day. I don’t want to over sell it, but Gideon has that Glen Powell look to him, where he seems like he would be genuinely interested in you. Now, normally I’d hate that, but I think even Gideon would win me over at the pub by happily talking about Richard Linklater’s Before trilogy. We’ll never be best friends, but I’ll also be happy to see him show up at a drinking establishment.
11. Phase

Favourite Drink: Montucky Cold Snacksor Pabst Blue Ribbon
I like Phase a lot, she is the closest to a main I have. She has by far the best costumes in the game, even if they feel entirely incongruent with the rest of the cast. As for drinking in the pub I think she’d be pretty fun although her referring to Bullet for My Valentine as ‘classic rock’ would turn me to dust. Her ‘I’m going to link yah’ ability would able to provide us power boost and pick me up if I fall over.
As long as she could put up with me occasionally giving her the odd look when she said something like “My Grandad is into retro bands like Nirvana”, I’d think we’d get on great.
10. Serath

Favourite Drink: Anything that looks good in a chalice
I always thought Serath would be pompous and self-important, but after her recent set of unlockables for the Winter event – there is a lighter side to Serath. I can see myself finding a good cup of mulled wine with her over the cold Christmas period. Seems like the sort of woman who would start crying if you start to play Explosions In the Sky.
I think the team have done a good job of developing her character through incidental emotes and new profile pics. Impressive given how little there is to go on from the Wiki.
9. Grux

Favourite Drink: Some kind of old English Ale stuff
Despite the berserker rages he goes into in on the lanes, Grux keeps it on the field. His body means that he drinks several gallons of beer during in an evening. Grux is more like one of those purists, waffles on about the good old days before Brewdog ruined everything, while he drinks the kind of boring pints that I served old men in the early 2000s. Even though his choice of beverage is not for me, I do think he would have several venues he would be able to recommend, barely any music playing, a bench with an indent of all previous visitors’ butts in it. The perfect kind of place for two mildly grumpy people to complain about the state of John Cleese.
8. Zarus

Favourite Drink: Thai Snake Whiskey
Zarus is just a big galumping Lizardman. He was the first character I learned to play as while going up against bots. This guy looks like the kind of braggart that would try make you believe he flew a Spitfire in the second World War… I imagine him committed to the bit and might even be able to tell me what kind of engines it had, what his flight routes were, and what friends he lost on the way.
I’d be on some kind of herb-based liquor and I would be like ‘Zarus, how were the English dealing with you being giant talking lizard?’, he’d do something like point out that the Polish were allowed to fly, so why not a giant, semi-naked Lizard?
This might break down into me calling Zarus a racist and him pointing out he’d actually use the term ‘Speciest’. Watching a giant Lizard get drunk and bullshit his way through a conversation would be the best.
7. Morigesh

Favourite Drink: Mojito
There is a popular club night in Brighton called ‘Party in your Pants’ – the title is pretty self-explanatory. The thing is all the people I’ve met that frequent it are super relaxed and awesome people to hang out with. Morigesh with her penchant for body paint is an utter fit for that club night.
This tracks with how I reckon Morigesh is: someone you could share thoughts and cogitate.
Plus, the latest sets of banners unlocked in the battle pass imply that Aurora and she are best buddies, so that is going to be party central. Just don’t get into a drinking contest.
6. Argus

Favourite Drink: Cider
Argus is that Uncle. Not that uncle, not the one that shows up at gatherings and brings with them a black cloud of doom. Argus is the cool uncle who gets you your first band T-Shirt, not because he had to ask, but because he recognised a track you’ve been playing for ages. The chill uncle who catches you smoking, gives you a sermon on why he has to rat you out to your parents and you end up okay with it. For sure he would have taught you how to blow things up with your first chemistry set.
With someone like Argus you grow to realise he is now bottom tier in most of the roles he plays in, but he is still good to be kicking back with a couple of pints of cloudy apple cider.
5. Riktor

Favourite Drink: Chimay
It is clear that Riktor is a party animal, with an appetite for drink. All of his costumes are bawdy, the most recent one being an outrageous Krampus suit. Given his more corpulent nature, but still incredibly mobile, Riktor is someone that can appreciate a gregarious lifestyle. His indulgences are going to be rich Belgium brews, high percentages in small glasses. I reckon he’d be a Karaoke guy too, he’d use his chain pull to grab you off your seat and drunkenly sing lots of Meatloaf and Queen.
4. Kira

Favourite Drink: Blavod and orange juice
Kira has slipped into the lower tier Carry list recently, that doesn’t change the fact that she would a great person to go drinking with. Looking like a person that not only owns a house, but also has it filled full of taxidermised animals, and acting like an extra from the rarely mentioned Doomsday film – Kira would still be great fun to sit in a boozer and go back and forth on the finer points of life. Finer points like should pineapple go on pizza? What was the best season of Always Sunny in Philadelphia? How funny was Robert Smith’s response to that reporter about The Cure getting into the Rock and Roll Hall of fame: funny or hilarious?
3. Drongo

Favourite Drink: Victoria Bitter
As I was putting this list together Drongo went up and down the rankings. His tagline ‘I don’t even know why I am here!’ should conjure little faith, but the man rides his rocket launcher when he gets launched in the air. I was once drunk in Melbourne, late at night, walking down the street in the opposite direction were two topless Bogans (a term of endearment, sort of, for certain Australian youth) and I immediately tensed up – in England encountering someone like this probably meant I was going to get my head kicked in. One of them asked me to high five them, against my better judgement I did, and then he hugged me and told me everyone had refused to high five him. That’s the energy Drongo is gonna bring to any night. A sense of unpredictability and vulnerability, he is baffled and delighted by everything he encounters. There’ll be plenty of very cheap Australian beer too. Classic Bogan.
2. Narbash

Favourite Drink: I think he’d drink the ullage out of the beer slop trays if you let him.
Okay, okay, now I know a few people have probably read my part about Gideon, and rolled their eyes when I confidently declared that Gideon was the only character that gets any. I can hear them grumbling “What about Narbash, and all that Rule 34 fanart I drew of him?”. They are absolutely right, if there is one other Predecessor Hero that regular draws the attention of ladies and men alike, it is Narbash. Charismatic, big smile, excellent musician and always there with the heals and props.
Things have been unkind to him in the meta with only the best being able to get the most out of him but I don’t think that would bother him. This green boy was built to drink and make merry, I can imagine him drum a beat as the rest of the bar shouts ‘Shots, shots, shots’. But also, I reckon he would be another good listener as well as capable of telling a yarn or two.
1. Terra

Favourite Drink: Mead from a horn, like a boss
I’ll be honest, Terra is my main. She is the first hero I learnt to play decently and whenever I see someone select Terra as a Jungle, I know I am in safe hands. This is also the reason that this (almost 5000 word) list exists. I sat there as Terra got her first power up and she went ‘Ah another hearty brew!’ and I knew that I wanted to have a beer with her. A big, buff, heavily armoured lady with the best attitude. Everything is ‘Nae Bother’ and you know Terra is dining in Valhalla every death, fighting giants, and then respawning to fight more people. Terra is clearly a legend in her spare time, Her penchant for the ‘brew’ is clearly defined, and she stomps about the world like a woman looking for a better boozer.
Indefatigable, gregarious, and the best.
Wow, this took way too much time to get this far in a top 40 list. I wrote for multiple days, and tried to give each character (except for Kwang) the attention they deserved.
I trawled through both websites looking for more insight on the heroes and struggled to find it. I think that is really why this list exists, a sincere attempt to give each one of these characters some semblance of a personality. I’ve probably played some 200 hours of the game, and I just needed to come to terms with who would be the best to have a beer with. I hope this tier list settles the argument.
If you missed Part One, check it out here.
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